I LIVE ....

Memories of a little blond boy who was only 4 when so much transition in his life occurred. I am not sure what happened but all of the sudden I panicked about what he would do if he was lost. Would he remember an address? So I began to explain to him that he lived in the United States of America, in the state of Georgia, in the town of Lincolnton, on Bethany Church Hill Road. We have long since moved from this address, but I still can hear his little boy voice saying this. Does your child know their address?

Christmas 2010

It's a different Christmas this year. I guess it all started 17 years ago. My husband and I were living in this apartment in Lawton, Oklahoma. We bought a real tree, and for months we vacuumed needles, upon moving out, we still were picking up needles, hoping to remove a possible fine for not cleaning well enough. Our second year of marriage we found the perfect artificial tree, breaking our budget we bought it. It looked great, year after year, and looked real. Every year we seemed to get wiser about how to put it up, wrapping it in saran wrap color coded, it was a real effort and took a long time to get it looking the way we liked. Last year, it seemed our reason for purchasing this tree had come to an end. Our tree after 16 years of being put up and taken down, branches spread by a family of 6....was shedding it's needles. Once again our reason for not buying a real tree was happening by our fake tree. This being the second year of debate, the tree was put on free cycle. Our plan was to hit the after Christmas tree sales. I would see a tree but being 8 months pregnant, didn't want to deal with the box. Our family of now 7 has yet to put up a Christmas tree, maybe 2010 we will. This year we had no tree to put up. So here it is December 23rd, and we have not decorated. We'll head off to Grandma and Pop pop's house and most likely decorate their tree. In years past we have gone out to the field and cut down a tree. I will never forget the year, my Dad wanting to save the life of a tree, bought a tree for $5 at Lowes, we hauled the tree out into the field, then later returned with all the grands and had them "cut down" the tree.....only the oldest knew it was a fraud...but Pop made her pose for a photo anyway. Christmas morning the children gather and remember the true meaning of Christmas. They sing Happy Birthday Jesus as they walk down in birth order....guess Nate will change things this year, all too soon he'll be walking down those stairs. Then they gather in the living room for Pop to read them the Christmas story, usually he tears up with emotion at this point. From there we will gather in the large room and open gift. Yes every year my husband and I give three gifts to each child remember the gifts of the Wise Men.....Gold, frankincense and myrrh....at least we hope they remember the Wise Men who searched for 2 years to find the Christ Child. Long ago I remember hearing this story by Paul Harvey....(I love hearing him on the radio and have sat many a time waiting for "the rest of the story." Big size The Man and the Birds by Paul Harvey The man to whom I'm going to introduce you was not a scrooge, he was a kind decent, mostly good man. Generous to his family, upright in his dealings with other men. But he just didn't believe all that incarnation stuff which the churches proclaim at Christmas Time. It just didn't make sense and he was too honest to pretend otherwise. He just couldn't swallow the Jesus Story, about God coming to Earth as a man. "I'm truly sorry to distress you," he told his wife, "but I'm not going with you to church this Christmas Eve." He said he'd feel like a hypocrite. That he'd much rather just stay at home, but that he would wait up for them. And so he stayed and they went to the midnight service. Shortly after the family drove away in the car, snow began to fall. He went to the window to watch the flurries getting heavier and heavier and then went back to his fireside chair and began to read his newspaper. Minutes later he was startled by a thudding sound...Then another, and then another. Sort of a thump or a thud...At first he thought someone must be throwing snowballs against his living room window. But when he went to the front door to investigate he found a flock of birds huddled miserably in the snow. They'd been caught in the storm and, in a desperate search for shelter, had tried to fly through his large landscape window. Well, he couldn't let the poor creatures lie there and freeze, so he remembered the barn where his children stabled their pony. That would provide a warm shelter, if he could direct the birds to it. Quickly he put on a coat, galoshes, tramped through the deepening snow to the barn. He opened the doors wide and turned on a light, but the birds did not come in. He figured food would entice them in. So he hurried back to the house, fetched bread crumbs, sprinkled them on the snow, making a trail to the yellow-lighted wide open doorway of the stable. But to his dismay, the birds ignored the bread crumbs, and continued to flap around helplessly in the snow. He tried catching them...He tried shooing them into the barn by walking around them waving his arms...Instead, they scattered in every direction, except into the warm, lighted barn. And then, he realized that they were afraid of him. To them, he reasoned, I am a strange and terrifying creature. If only I could think of some way to let them know that they can trust me...That I am not trying to hurt them, but to help them. But how? Because any move he made tended to frighten them, confuse them. They just would not follow. They would not be led or shooed because they feared him. "If only I could be a bird," he thought to himself, "and mingle with them and speak their language. Then I could tell them not to be afraid. Then I could show them the way to safe, warm...to the safe warm barn. But I would have to be one of them so they could see, and hear and understand." At that moment the church bells began to ring. The sound reached his ears above the sounds of the wind. And he stood there listening to the bells - Adeste Fidelis - listening to the bells pealing the glad tidings of Christmas. And he sank to his knees in the snow.

Happy Birthday Nate

Three years, Three years old.....TIME FLIES. You are the highlight of our time here in Warner Robins. That quiet year spent in Kathleen wasn't so quiet. We packed up and left for this house (my tent) I have long since pitched this place but realized it was for a moment in time we would be living here.

That first 9 months of living here was exhausting. I was so tired being pregnant. Your first year went by so quickly and then I had my eyes done on February 2nd, I could see you almost perfectly by the 6th. I missed your first birthday vision wise, but I could hear it. Karen made you a teddy bear cake.

Your second birthday we spent with angel food cake and you snitched the first one, we didn't need a second cake but it was made anyway.

Today is your third birthday. Superbowl Sunday!! We'll get you pizza and a chocolate cake from Publix. Happy Birthday little boy.

Remember God I am your favorite kid...

A long standing joke, but I am serious. God loves me. I am His favorite kid. He is there guiding me through life and speaking to me. Listening is my job. I guess I am wondering what is on the next page.

Waiting to find out. I am exited but also holding my breath.

Marriage

Marriage is not about trying to get someone to change it is about changes. Years pass and the twist and turn for how you wanted things to be and how they are,happen. How you chose to live those changes and the choices you make form your marriage. It can be the most incredible journey.

Animals, those pets you pick up along the way, the names that are understood between a spouse. Remember the white cat, the one that was there for only a brief period of time? The one the old lady and man who lived a few doors down in the Manhattan house gave to us? Do you remember? They taught me so much about washing old pillows and putting the feathers into vats and drying them out and using them again for other items. They gave us that white cat. I wonder if you do remember that old white cat and how hard it was to say good-bye to her. She had lukemia and the girl next door, I have long since forgotten her name, Keri perhaps. I remember her husband and what a jerk he was. I remember saying good-bye to the cat to protect her world of loved persians. Now one else can share that memory with me. There are so many more. Do you remember? Remember? Our many memories together.

Marriage is not about changing someone, it is about enjoying the changes that come your way and enjoying the process of time and watching how things become. Grow old with me the best is yet to be.

It's Christmastime

It's Christmastime, the tree is up, the stockings are out, and some toys are newly purchased and yes we are playing early and celebrating. It's that time of year. Do we seem to focus on Jesus the true reason we put up decorations, celebrating his coming to earth in man form, a baby. What Mary must of felt, and Joseph, the wonder of it all is still there today. I look at my precious kids, all in different stages of life and hope and pray that they carry this love of God with them and want to live for Him.

What are they learning this time of year, the end of one semester going into another, I pay for two girls to attend a private school to prepare them for life. The attend two days a week but one day is a work day for the oldest.....it's worth the financial strain and I enjoy seeing them go off and leave the house. I am not a firm homeschooler, but have stumbled on this way of life by accident, or more divine guidance. To be honest it's a stretch. I do feel it is beneficial to our family.

My sons have chosen to study their Bible Quizzing material today, determined to do better this next meet. This is what life provides while homeschooling a chance to focus on different things.

Church Shopping

Oops, I guess I found out something....I am not Independent Baptist, mainly I found out I am Independent, and yes even the B word....but not enough to be Independent Baptist, from what I understand the head pastor is in charge. Sure that might work some places but for me, it was a NOOOOOO!!! It's the NEW part of being that I found interesting. I didn't understand that he was the authority or in this case the pass the buck to, and see if anything happens type of thing.....anyway my comfort level lacked after a church pastor handed an old church over to the church I attended. Let's just say watching how things changed hands was a bit much for me.

I then went on a missions trip and by the end of it, I knew I needed to be with my Titus 2 lady. She attends different church, and when I went I learned more in one Sunday about the Jewish culture, and decided to stay. So life goes on, my family part of it stays at the Independent church and I have left to be part of the Missionary Alliance Church. It's different, it's small, but mostly I am learning more.